My Top Ten Pregnancy Peeves

(Warning: This is going to be a long post!)

My boys.

We are expecting our third child in Jan 2011.  This pregnancy has been a little bit more difficult than the previous two.  I attribute that to age and the fact that I have two older boys to run after!  Nevertheless, I am enjoying this pregnancy, as I had enjoyed my previous two.  I have been blessed in many ways.  My morning sickness was mild compared to the horror stories I have heard.  I don't have stretch marks.  My hair and skin feel great. I don't have swellings of my hands and feet.  I don't get impossibly huge.  And until my recent complications, my body was agile enough to walk 4 -5 km weekly + engage in Pilates classes.

I do however, have some pet peeves. And when something peeved me off recently, I was inspired to make a list of my "pregnancy peeves".  So here are my top 10.

Pregnancy Peeve #1: Morning Sickness. Ok, I know I said my morning sickness was mild compared to the horror stories I have heard.   However, when you are feeling weak because you are hungry but can't bear the smell of the morning prata (or the morning papers - yes, the smell of the Today newspaper made me sick...), the last thing you want to do is think about how much worse it could be.

And don't be fooled, morning sickness can happen throughout the day. Apparently, one trick is to take dry toast and crackers.   I found it helped.   Probably because they were tasteless and had no smell. "Sng Boey" (preserved sour plums) a traditional nausea remedy does not help.  And in fact made me feel worse.

I remember often feeling upset because it meant it took more effort to do the things I had to do (work, kids etc.), but I was encouraged by the fact that it would fade after the first trimester.  And it did fade.  My heart goes out to those suffering from hyperemesis gravidarum, which is basically severe nausea throughout pregnancy.  

Pregnancy Peeve #2: The Fat Look. That in between stage at around 4 - 5 months when you aren't showing much yet, but your tummy is getting bigger. i.e. you just look fat.  And you are too small to wear proper maternity clothes so you have to get regular clothes in bigger sizes that don't quite fit because the rest of the proportions are just wrong.  Then you really just look like you don't know how to dress yourself.

Pregnancy Peeve #3: Don't Touch My Tummy! You wouldn't touch my tummy, or even talk about it when I am not pregnant. So what makes you think it's OK when I am? My tummy has been the subject of countless conversations with perfect strangers, especially in elevators (whether it's sharp or round, or big or small, or wide or compact, or boy or girl shaped). And these strangers have felt free to feel me up. I don't even think it's OK for my friends to touch my tummy. It's private. So HANDS OFF!

Pregnancy Peeve #4: Don't Guess the Age.  On a related note, please try not to guess how far along by the look of my tummy or compare it with the next lady's.  I don't appreciate being subject to such close scrutiny.  Would you?

Pregnancy Peeve #5: Toilet Breaks. I can live with the more frequent trips to the loo during the day, but when I have to keep getting up during the night (especially in the last few weeks), I get really grumpy.  I need my sleep!!!

Pregnancy Peeve #6: Leg cramps. Not only do I get woken up by the need to use the loo, I get woken up by leg cramps in the middle of the night.  Most unpleasant, especially when you can't reach your leg because your tummy is in the way.  

Pregnancy Peeve #7: Bed rest. I have had to be hospitalised and put on bed rest for my second and third pregnancies.  Bed rest can be the most painful thing in the world. You are so bored because you really can't do anything, and you have to learn to rely on others to help you.  And after you are allowed to move about, you find that you have lost a lot of muscle tone and just walking to the living room is tiring.  Thank goodness for my iPad.  I couldn't have survived bed rest without it. 

Pregnancy Peeve #8: Girl or Boy? I don't mind people asking me for the gender of the baby, but I get quite annoyed by those who assume that I must somehow be disappointed that I am having a third boy.   Do not assume that we were trying for a girl, or that somehow we think it would be nicer to have a girl the third time round.  We don't care. We really don't.  We just wanted another CHILD.  Gender was irrelevant in our considerations.  

For the record, we are very, very pleased it's going to be a boy and we love him to bits.  So please don't shake your heads and act like it's such a tragedy or imply that somehow we won't love this little boy as much as if it was going to be a girl.  There's no need to talk about how nice it would be to have a girl (is there a point to such discussions?), and enough with the, "Oh...it's OK. Boys are fun too..." etc..  Of course I know boys are fun. I have two.  We don't need your condolences.  Just your congratulations and best wishes.  (And of course, please don't congratulate us for having three boys, we would have been happy with three girls too.  Like I said, gender doesn't matter.)

Pregnancy Peeve #9: Gestational Diabetes Mellitus.  I do not have Type 2 diabetes. But during pregnancy, my hormones go haywire and my body has trouble producing enough insulin.  This condition is called Gestational Diabetes Mellitus (GDM) and if left uncontrolled can have severe consequences for the baby.

I hate it.  Because this means I have to (1) watch my diet very carefully (low calorie, low glucose diet); and, (2) monitor my blood glucose levels four (sometimes six) times a day, seven days a week.  

Both are a pain.  I know that (1) is probably what I should be doing anyway because you really want to have a healthy diet when you are pregnant, but it's really hard to maintain a diabetes-friendly diet especially if you eat out a lot due to work.  At one point, all I was eating was fish porridge every day.  At the same time, there were concerns that I wasn't gaining enough weight  (well, if you were only eating fish porridge you would be losing weight too).  So it has been tricky trying to balance having to eat sufficiently for me to gain enough weight, and not too much such that my blood glucose levels were going crazy.  One would have thought that by the third pregnancy I would have become an expert.  But nope.  No two pregnancies are the same and I've had to learn to adjust to new levels of insulin resistance for each pregnancy.

(2) is literally a pain as this involves pricking my fingertips for a drop of blood to be measured. I'm resigned to having sore fingertips.  I have a system to rotate my fingers so that they don't get too sore, and I try to avoid squeezing lemons or limes.  I have to bring my meter everywhere.  It comes in a small black purse-like holder.  Having GDM is costly too. Each test costs me $1.65 (for the needle, the test strip, alcohol swabs).  That's more than $46 a week.  On top of that there are extra visits to the doctor for monitoring purposes. 

Fortunately, I've not had to be put on a regular insulin regimen yet (though I have had insulin shots).  And fortunately, for me the condition goes away after pregnancy.  However, this may not always be the case.  For some women, pregnancy uncovers Type 2 diabetes, so the diabetes doesn't go away after delivery.  I'm hoping I'll be clear after this pregnancy. I really want to be able to eat normally again.  

Pregnancy Peeve #10:   "Mumnesia".  I hate to say this, but after three pregnancies, I've come to realise that I do get more forgetful and muddle-headed during pregnancy.  Sometimes it feels like a brain fog.  I'm not sure if it is hormonal.  I would like to blame in on a lack of sleep (see causes in #6 and #5).  I also get a lot clumsier due to physical changes.  I have discovered bruises on my arms and legs probably from tripping and walking into walls, and I don't always remember how I get them.  Unfortunately, the forgetfulness will last well into toddlerhood, as I know my sleep deprivation will only get worse in the months ahead!

So what are your pregnancy peeves?